Game that Sucked that Bad, that Craved Its Name...

FortNinety · Joined: 04 Dec 2006 Location: New York, New York

... in the History of the Family Computer."

So has anyone around here ever played Takeshi no Chousenjou? I was flipping through the Tokyo Metropolitan Museum of Photography's Famicom retrospective, which includes synopsis of various games, and one caught my eye, primarily because it features Takeshi "Beat" Kitano on the cover (since I'm a fan of his films). According to the book, he poured all his ideas into the game, and a result was a "complete disaster". The author even goes so far to say that "we could be more than just kind by say[ing] that this was 'an ambitious piece which pushed the limit of the video game', but 'the worst sucking game' would be the adequate words to express it".

Also according to the book, the plot of the game involves a perfectly ordinary business man who gets fired from his job and, in the end, finds treasure on some island. It appeared to be an "adventure game", with directions given to you as you went along, such as "hit the pedestrians out of the blue" or "leave the controller alone for one hour , otherwise you can't go ahead" or "hitting the enemy twenty thousand times will end the game". It was also mentioned that its literally impossible to accomplish any of the tasks to actually beat the game.

But the most interesting thing is how the book refers to the "Friday Incident" which isn't at all explained, other than it happened right before its release, which gave it a lot of attention, which in turn led to added attention and sales, increasing the number of "victims".

The book also says that the publisher received over 400 phone calls ever single day, every one of them frustrated and angry gamers asking how to beat it, including children on the verge of tears. The best part is the closer: "There is another legendary anecdote that its employees who were completely at a loss, persuaded its readers by saying 'the person in charge died'."

So... has anyone played this game? I would imagine that its probably among one of the many rom packs that included huge chunks of Famicom softs that gets passed around, but which very few people actually take the time to truly explore.

If so, how is it? Is it really that bad? Even by today's post modern, we'll take crap and view it as genius, state of mind?

Then again, am I the only one who was reminded of Penn & Teller's Sega CD game when reading about the part about leaving the controller alone for an hour? I will admit... the game does sorta sound like genius after-all.

And what's this Friday Incident? I've searched online but haven't found any info. But according to Wikipedia, the game is sorta known in certain circles in Japan. In fact, its apparently listed in top 50 Famicom games of all time lists, though it believed to be a joke. I guess our equivalent of Cosmic Race?

BTW, here's a clip of the game in action. Doesn't look half bad really.
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dark steve · Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 7:40 am

c'mon dude proofread that title

Kappuru · forum bishonen Joined: 05 Dec 2006

I remember my cousin's dad had this game. There was a part where you had to yell (or sing?) into the controller for like an hour. He just put on an enka album very loud. I dont remember if it worked or not..
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negativedge · Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 9:51 am

You could say Beat Takashi beat Gouchi Suda at his own game, only he did it like twenty years earlier, and a little more elegantly.

Non gaming people designing games is something I'd like to see more of. Who do we have, besides Takashi? Shigesato Itoi, obviously. Anyone else? Could you imagine what it would be like if someone famous on this side of the Pacific decided to make a game? That would be really something.

And no, Marc Echo does not count.

It's like...what if Andy Warhol were alive, today, and made a video game? What if Thomas Pynchon crawled out of his basement and got a team together? Would it be cheap, or important? I don't know, but I'll tell you one thing: it would have fuck all to do with World War II (you know, unless we were talking about Kurt Vonnegut)

Levi · Joined: 05 Dec 2006

I remember reading somewhere that Michael Chrichton wanted to make a game with Sega...

Texican Rude · Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 11:56 am

Yeah this thing is pretty monumentally terrible. Hopefully Brendan will be by later to explain more!

FortNinety · Joined: 04 Dec 2006 Location: New York, New York

Persona-sama · Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 1:01 pm

Oh, I thought it was just bad word choice too. Maybe use a single quote instead?
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haze · Joined: 04 Dec 2006

I played it a little. I got to this pachinko parlor and started playing that. watching as every time i pushed the button, white pixels went flying up and failed to score me anything. "this is just like the real thing..." and I kept at it for a while.

it was just so absurd that it was amusing. I'm willing to believe those who say there was an overall point to it!

boojiboy7 · Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 2:04 pm

FortNinety · Joined: 04 Dec 2006 Location: New York, New York

Persona-sama · Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 2:47 pm

Hmm.. I suppose you're out of luck then, Fort. :/

You could always go the asterix plus footnote like our tried and tested method* too.

*- for girls only.
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luvcraft · buy my game buy my game me me me Joined: 05 Dec 2006

I never knew Takeshi Kitano was that young.

CanadianEd · Joined: 04 Dec 2006

Jeff Garneau · Joined: 04 Dec 2006

The first half of a speedrun is here, the second part here

also there's a bug speedrun on youtube. I remember someone posting on ic a japanese page with a full walkthrough of the game, but I can't find it now.

Technically this isn't really Takeshi's only game for the Famicom, as his game show (Takeshi's Castle, better known as MXC around here) has a licensed game that uses the running pad. I assume it's pretty hard, though the power pad is pretty difficult to use on its own.

duomo · Joined: 04 Dec 2006

Michael Crichton was involved in a game.

Koji · Joined: 04 Dec 2006

I'm quite a fan of Kitano's movies too. I think it was Wikipedia that claimed that Kitano hates videogames, hence how much this game sucks, in a mocking way. Also remember that Kitano used to be a comedian.

I'd like to play it some time, but since it requires that special microphone pad, I don't think it is emulated appropriately. It sounds quite silly and not really worth the frustration though.

I'll check that speedrun now.

dark steve · Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 10:25 pm

CanadianEd · Joined: 04 Dec 2006

Took the time to research more clarifications, because I so totally don't feel like studying for that final I have tomorrow right now.

The "Friday Incident" quoted by the original post was actually an event that took place on a Tuesday!

What apparently happened was that on December 8th, 1986, a reporter from the weekly photo magazine called "Friday" assaulted/stalked the 21 year-old university student Takeshi was dating at the time (note: he was 39 then - you go, man!) for material, and presumably in the process of running away the girl in question sustained minor injuries.

Takeshi promptly contacts the publisher Kodansha wishing to discuss the matter in person, but was flat-out ignored. So, he proceeds to tell Kodansha "I'm going to come tell you exactly what I think about your damned reporting practices right now!" and shows up at their offices sometime past midnight (thus being early morning on December 9th, 1986) with 11 members of the "Takeshi Gundan" (the team of entertainers that he had taken under his wing) and beat up Friday magazine's editing staff with fire extinguishers and umbrellas. (I am not making this up.) They are eventually apprehended and the incident makes the headlines on newspapers and TV, being covered as serious national news (as in, like, 6pm news) as opposed to gossipy (E! style) entertainment news.

Takeshi's Challenge (I've always thought that was a pretty shitty translation for the title, btw, I think "Takeshi Challenges YOU!" captures the spirit of the title a lot better) went on sale the following day on Wednseday, December 10th, 1986.

It is notable that as a result of this incident Beat Takeshi abstained from making public appearances for quite a while, and received a 6-month jail sentence and 2 years of probation on June 10th, 1987. On a positive note (?) the reporter who caused the event in the first place was also put on trial and received his own (unspecified) sentence under public pressure.

Persona-sama · Posted: Wed Dec 06, 2006 6:27 am

That is the most amazing thing I've ever heard.

If only celebrities did this in America, life would be more entertaining.
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negativedge · Posted: Wed Dec 06, 2006 12:19 pm

Oh God CanadianEd you are my new favorite poster.

newave · Joined: 05 Dec 2006 Location: Los Angeles

lolipalooza · Joined: 05 Dec 2006 Location: Curitiba, Brazil

kthorjensen · Joined: 06 Dec 2006

FortNinety · Joined: 04 Dec 2006 Location: New York, New York

This Machine Kills Fascis · Posted: Fri Dec 08, 2006 1:27 am

I bought this game off of eBay--loose cart--for, like, six bucks after seeing Tim name-drop it and doing the obligatory Wikipedia research. I don't have a Famicom, and I don't plan on having the money to get one, anytime soon. Still, I figure that I'm just as well-off, lacking the actual means to play, when it comes to this game.

(Those were some jagged sentences.)

Edit: The Friday Incident information is my new favorite story. Thanks CanadaEd!
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