[Ebrey]

I'm applying for a job at gametrailers that requires a video game review and an article, and I decided to do a Phoenix Wright 2 review and a Castlevania retrospective. Since this job sounds really cool I was hoping you guys could help me improve the articles (and feel free to talk about the games too).

Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Justice For All

The Phoenix Wright games are a series of popular lawyer sims for the Nintendo DS, originally published on the Gameboy Advance in Japan. The anime-style graphics hold up fine despite being several years old, and the first game steadily gained popularity due to it’s dynamic storytelling and unusual gameplay. The games consist of investigations, where you explore crime scenes for clues and interview people, and trials, where you listen to testimonies and present evidence to catch witnesses’ lies. The senile judge would gladly pronounce your client guilty just to get on with his day, and the prosecutor is a whip-wielding eighteen year old girl: the legally astute may notice some discrepancies between Phoenix Wright and the real world, but they exist to make the game funnier and raise the tension.

Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Justice For All isn’t substantially different from the first game. It still features murder mysteries full of twists, colorful characters, and the satisfaction of seeing Phoenix thrust his giant finger at the prosecutor when you raise an objection. The major new feature, the “Psyche-Lock,” is a subtle but nice improvement. During the investigation mode, when someone starts dodging your questions, you will see locks on the mystery. Cracking the witness requires you to present evidence and answer questions that show you have some idea of who or what they are protecting. Sometimes there will be several people with Psyche-Locks and the player has to figure out which can be broken first, which adds complexity to a game that is often too straightforward.

Unfortunately, every aspect of the game that has not been changed is not quite as fun the second time around. Players of the first game will not be surprised that each case of Justice For All revolves around a tragedy in the past which affected the victim, murderer, and witnesses. Nor will the novelty of shouting “Objection” into the DS’ microphone bring such sheer joy. Worst of all, a flaw from the later cases of the first game is even more present here: Justice For All can be maddeningly, and unnecessarily, difficult. There are times when it makes sense to present several different pieces of evidence (for instance, either a picture with a wine glass in it, or the wine glass itself) but the game only accepts one of them, forcing the player to guess or use a walkthrough. The Phoenix Wright series doesn’t need a radical overhaul, but the developers should give the player more ways to succeed rather than forcing us to guess what they want.

Fans of the first game will enjoy simply being able to revisit the cast of Phoenix Wright and it’s crazy take on legal action (it resembles a Street Fighter match more than Law & Order). Those who complete the first three cases will be rewarded with a long, and morally complex, final case where Phoenix must defend a client against his will, with good reasons to doubt his innocence. On the other hand, people who bought the first game because it was different than most games that reach our shores, and who don’t have any special attachment to the characters (they‘re colorful, but so are the casts of many anime and television shows), should skip this and wait for news of a more innovative Phoenix Wright installment.

[Ebrey]

What happened to My Castlevania Series?

The Castlevania series is in dire need of a revamp, but it may not be obvious to those who haven’t followed the series since the NES. At least your games are playable, the disgruntled Sonic fan might say. True, but it’s been a long time since the Castlevania games have lived up to the greatness of their ancestors.

While there are many Castlevania spinoffs (games that didn‘t feature proper Belmonts, the vampire hunting family that stars in the series), and an endless number of versions of the original, the main series was the most consistently enjoyable and innovative. Most people played the first Castlevania on the NES, and remember it as a difficult, linear platformer with wonderful music. The series showed it’s depth, and guts, when the second NES game was an action-RPG with exploration, a creepy atmosphere, and more catchy tunes. This differentiated the Castlevania series from Capcom’s platformer, Megaman, which had a more interesting premise but never evolved into anything different. The third game seemed to go back to the style of the original with individual levels, but it featured alternate routes, multiple characters, and creepy rather than shlocky art, which showed the team had learned a thing or two about non-linearity and horror when making Castlevania II.

After the NES the series abandoned numbers, and went in a variety of directions including a remake for the SNES and a spinoff for the Genesis. But the real continuation of the series was Dracula X: Rondo of Blood for the TurboDuo, a CD-based system that never gained much popularity in the US, causing the game to remain in Japan. Like Castlevania III, Rondo featured multiple paths and characters, but this time, you had to discover the secret levels and rescue prisoners by exploring the levels, which were larger and less linear. Just as the bones of a half-ape, half-man help scientists understand evolution, Rondo is the missing link between the classic Castlevanias we loved as kids and the current ones on the market.

The Playstation’s Dracula X: Symphony of the Night is a direct sequel to Rondo of Blood, but with far more radical gameplay. Symphony was set in a gigantic castle rather than individual levels, and had a Super Metroid-style map, causing many to call this game and it’s sequels ‘Castleroids’ or ‘Metrovanias’ (which also mocks their androgynous characters). In truth, while Metroid provided some useful tools to the Castlevania developers, Symphony was also an evolution of the exploration elements of Castlevania II and Rondo. The game allowed players to immerse themselves in Castlevania’s gothic aesthetic as never before, thanks to better graphics, CD quality sound, and the unity of a single castle.

When you look at these five games, you see that the Castlevania series was never afraid to change it’s formula radically, then reincorporate an element of a past game in a new way. Because of this the series stayed fresh and actually became better, despite the original games being popular and enjoyable. Unfortunately, the franchise took a wild turn after this - into sameness.

One of the first Gameboy Advance games was Castlevania: Circle of the Moon, which despite being a spinoff developed by a now defunct division of Konami, adhered closely to Symphony of the Night. When the Symphony team announced that they were making their own followup, optimistic fans thought that they would evolve the series as wonderfully as Symphony had with its release. Instead, we’ve gotten year after year of very similar ‘Castleroids’, which deviates from the Castlevania ideal precisely because it does not deviate from its formula. Their only real innovation was Aria of Sorrow’s soul system, which let the player use the abilities of fallen abilities. The sole interesting feature of the three Gameboy Advance games was then reused completely in Dawn of Sorrow, showing that Konami failed to understand why Aria was so well received: because it actually made an attempt at doing something different.

Of course, the two 3D Castlevanias for PS2 did provide some changes. In fact, they replicated whip and weapon-based combat fine, and their robust graphical engine allowed us to see Dracula’s castle in a whole new way. Unfortunately, the developers stopped just before the finish line, without actually creating interesting levels for the game: they simply copied and pasted the same room and hallway over and over again. There’s no reason Castlevania can’t work in 3D, but it will require actual effort.

Konami needs to pull out all the stops and produce one Castlevania that is high budget, radically different, and extremely fun. Then they need to market the hell out of it. If it fails, they can declare the series unprofitable and stop making the games - after all, I’d rather have one sharp pain than be slowly killed like this. But if it succeeds, Castlevania can retake it’s rightful place as a premier video game franchise.

[Broco]

These are kind of boring and school-essay-ish, and there is at least one grammatical error. You're practically a guaranteed hire!

[Broco]

Okay, I feel a little mean just writing a snarky comment when you're asking for help. Let me at least point out some of the concrete things I don't like. The grammatical error I saw is "it's"; please look up the rule on that, it's really not complicated. Another easy thing to fix is, try cutting down on useless phrases like "Of course", "In fact", "Unfortunately", and so on; they just weigh down your writing.


More generally, a big problem with them is that the writing is pretty bloated and lacking in liveliness; take this snippet for example:

"While there are many Castlevania spinoffs (games that didn‘t feature proper Belmonts, the vampire hunting family that stars in the series), and an endless number of versions of the original, the main series was the most consistently enjoyable and innovative."

While I'd have to give it a little thought to figure out how to rewrite this better (I would probably end up avoiding stating this at all; what are you are really saying of interest?), the wording lacks that light-footed touch. For example, your parenthetical could be cut down to "(games without Belmonts, the series' family of vampire hunters)" without losing any meaning. "most consistently enjoyable and innovative" could be replaced with just "best". Almost every sentence in your articles could be lightened in this way.

This problem usually arises when people try too hard to adopt a formal, "writing" tone. Just write like you talk, then pare down the useless junk until you're left with the essentials.


The second problem is that the articles lack specifics. What is interesting is details and examples, not broad generalizations. Talk about dates, names, juicy development anecdotes, specific setpieces within the games, and so on.

[Balzac]

Instead of saying game a million times, why not try more colorful synonyms like "installment", "title", "entry into the series", "sequel", and my personal favorite, "vidcon".

And Broco, look at what he's up against: http://www.gametrailers.com/player.php?id=16503&type=mov&pl=game

[Broco]

[Ebrey]

Yeah, they're definitely formal and boring. I'll try to liven them up, but I don't want to wait too long before applying for the job - they might take the first 3 people who submit passable articles. Thanks for the comments.

[Dark Age Iron Savior]

Dude, don't do a Castlevania retrospective. You're too tainted by IC~SB bickering. Find something more interesting to write about.
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[diplo]

um, rondo isn't an evolution.

[Ebrey]

[JamesE]

Castlevania has had explore-me-do elemements since the MSX game, though (IE the first one)

[PianoMap]

I've always thought of Castlevania as one of the most mainstream series' there is, just based off of it's status as a 'classic'.

That Pheonix Wright review [on Gametrailers] was too painful to endure past the first minute.
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[The Ichiban Crush]

For the review:

The one thing I would do is spice that first paragraph up some. I'd try to dress up the description of the game itself, without really referring to "the game" if that makes sense. Kind of just a visualization of what you're witnessing as a whole. Afterwards, I'd briefly emphasize how unique the concept of a lawyerin' game series is, and the fact that there is a cult following.

One thing the review on GT did do right was touch on the features from the last game carried over to the sequel. Problem is, he took way too long doing it. I've noticed that your review briefly mentions them, but I'd add just a little bit more. Not too much though. Try to make the assumption that whoever is reading/listening to this review has never played any PW games, but at the same time, try not to bore those who have.

That's all I have.
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[nocturnedelight]

Why not criticize an entire genre or Company?

Dude, you should rag on TOSE.
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[L]

[Ebrey]