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L
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Joined: 05 Dec 2006
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 Posted: Wed Dec 18, 2013 7:13 am Post subject: Namco no Unknown Charas Dating Relationship Gamesoft |
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http://shiftylook.com/games/namcohigh
GOTY 2013
FREE VERSION OPTIONS:
Galaga (from Galaga), Lolo (from Klonoa), Valkyrie (from Legend of the Valkyrie), Anti-Bravoman (from Bravoman), Meowkie (from Mappy), Albatross (from Rolling Thunder)
PAID VERSION OPTIONS:
Taira (from Genpei Tomaden), Blue Max (from Sky Kid), Akiho Matsuo (from Wonder Momo), Nidia (from Dragon Spirit), Tomari (from Ordyne), Donko (from Taiko Drum Master), Hiromi (from Burning Force), Mr. Driller (from Mr. Driller), Richard Miller (from Time Crisis), Homestuck exchange students
| Andrew Hussie wrote: |
A while ago, ShiftyLook, which is a Namco Bandai jam, asked me if I wanted to work on a project for them. It could be anything. I said that sounds cool. Except that I already had a lot to do, so maybe it wasn't realistic. But they said that's no problem. All I had to do was assemble an elite team of writers, artists, and programmers, and tell them what to do. If I pulled together a crack squad of loyal creatives, they would HAVE to do what I said, no matter how little sense it made. So I said that sounds good. I thought about it really hard, for three of the most intellectually excruciating seconds of my life. Then I said we should make a dating sim. I mean. Obviously.
They said, are you sure that's a good idea? I said, hey who do you think is in charge here? They said they were. I said, oh, right. But it didn't matter. In the confusion, my pitch had somehow been approved due to a clerical error in Japan. Then I shouted suckers and fell backwards out of the airplane.
While tumbling magnificently back to Earth, I pulled the vintage rolodex out of my horsehair fannypack, and began recruiting the best of the best. And so my team was convened. They were waiting for me below with the trampoline thing firefighters use. They watched as the Hussie stunt-mannequin gently descended, and then exploded with unexpected confetti. I then revealed that I had been waiting there with them for the last several hours, wearing a disguise, straddling my most famous horse. I introduced myself, and they graciously pretended they didn't know it was me all along. (I repeat. Best of the best.) I then clapped my hands and rubbed them together a lot and said, who's ready to make some NOISE in the dating sim genre? Who's ready to DO SOME DAMAGE? Nobody knew what to say to that, so I pressed on valiantly. I think I know what the people want, I said. What they WANT, is to be able to manipulate their favorite classic video game characters into a variety of lurid but safe-for-work romantic encounters. What they WANT, for instance, is to cajole a cute Katamari into some sort of kissing situation with the spaceship from Galaga. Are you ready to GIVE THEM WHAT THEY WANT? They erupted into applause and began chanting my name, and they haven't stopped since. |
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bza
a very bad gay
Joined: 24 Jul 2010
Location: A cave in a swamp somewhere
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| Posted: Wed Dec 18, 2013 8:06 am |
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Making the Homestuck characters paid is probably the best idea there. I mean really, how can you NOT want to date a blind alien girl who sniffs and tastes things to see them? That's probably a few levels of moé right there.
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notbov
Joined: 14 Feb 2009
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| Posted: Wed Dec 18, 2013 1:16 pm |
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Galaga ship is free?
free2play gaming redeemed, GOTY 2013/2014/foreseeable future
the important question now is can I let Galaga ship be captured, respawn and save the original and have a pixelated 3-way
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Persona mobile
Joined: 11 Aug 2012
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| Posted: Wed Dec 18, 2013 11:13 pm |
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| notbov wrote: |
| Galaga ship is free? The important question now is can I let Galaga ship be captured, respawn and save the original and have a pixelated 3-way |
This would be a great Tweet.
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BotageL
pretty anime princess
Joined: 04 Dec 2006
Location: *fidget*
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 12:21 am |
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From what I hear this thing is basically unbearable if you aren't presently a teenager and thus a super-fan of Homestuck, so, yeah.
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notbov
Joined: 14 Feb 2009
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 3:12 am |
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| Persona mobile wrote: |
| notbov wrote: |
| Galaga ship is free? The important question now is can I let Galaga ship be captured, respawn and save the original and have a pixelated 3-way |
This would be a great Tweet. |
you are free to it
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notbov
Joined: 14 Feb 2009
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 4:45 am |
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going through the intro
they have all these obscure (relatively, anyway) characters and they call the principal Dig Dug. Taizo Hori has a name, goddammit (never mind Susumu being a dateable character)
3 minutes in and I'm already irate about something
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notbov
Joined: 14 Feb 2009
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 4:48 am |
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oh goodness
so jamming a bunch of disparate art styles together looks about as good in practice as you think it would
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notbov
Joined: 14 Feb 2009
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 4:58 am |
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so, I should probably be doing this in the axe, but I'm already in too deep
WHICH FREE NAMCO DUDE(TTE) DO I TRY TO GET WITH
no answers will be met with Galaga, the best girl
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BotageL
pretty anime princess
Joined: 04 Dec 2006
Location: *fidget*
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notbov
Joined: 14 Feb 2009
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 5:21 am |
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well, characters call Galaga an "it", but it's in Drama Club and going out for the role of Juliet
also
Galaga is totally the popular girl archetype
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notbov
Joined: 14 Feb 2009
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 5:33 am |
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man, Valkyrie wants that Cousin ass bad
also, the writing is kinda suspect, by which I mean "mediocre"
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notbov
Joined: 14 Feb 2009
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 5:59 am |
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wait, that's it
what the fuck, that's short as all get out and the story didn't really end, it just sorta went "oh hell, Pac-Man got kidnapped by Evil Namco High" (btw, Pac-Man is a faculty member, apparently) (Evil Namco High is just robot doppelgangers of the main cast instead of, well, I dunno, Namco villains). like, if the free stuff is supposed to sell me on the paid routes, then Mission Failed. this is ignoring the hilariously bad stock sound effects and some of the music, none of which is done up to loop properly
oh well, at least the Galaga route had some funny bits even if it was just a stock teen movie plot
(of course Galaga has human parents and lives in a villa, what kind of unrefined ship do you take it for)
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Mr. Apol
king of zembla
Joined: 04 Dec 2006
Location: a curiously familiar pit
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 6:02 am |
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that's not my wonder momo, those fucks
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L
⌐
Joined: 05 Dec 2006
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 6:35 am |
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| notbov wrote: |
| none of which is done up to loop properly |
This is actually a browser bug - HTML5 audio is not actually capable of looping seamlessly at present. |
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notbov
Joined: 14 Feb 2009
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 3:27 pm |
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| L wrote: |
| notbov wrote: |
| none of which is done up to loop properly |
This is actually a browser bug - HTML5 audio is not actually capable of looping seamlessly at present. |
I would sympathize more if they hadn't used a sound sample at one point that was 3 seconds long instead of making a longer one themselves to create the illusion of looping
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Rokkan
Joined: 30 Jan 2012
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 4:26 pm |
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| it's fucking bullshit they decided to put Lolo in instead of Klonoa i want to date a cute furry boy this is BULLSHIT |
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Schwere Viper
Joined: 14 Feb 2007
Location: Western Australia
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 4:59 pm |
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| Rokkan wrote: |
| it's fucking bullshit they decided to put Lolo in instead of Klonoa i want to date a cute furry boy this is BULLSHIT |
You can never date Klonoa, none of us can, beca--
...b-because he... *sniff*
he was just a dream ;______;
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Blog: Machines That Sing |
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shnozlak
Joined: 05 Dec 2006
Location: pushing crates in the sewer level
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notbov
Joined: 14 Feb 2009
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 6:13 pm |
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| shnozlak wrote: |
| Who approved this garbage? |
Funny thing, Hussie admits that he's not sure that it was ever approved and the Bamco president knows not either.
Lolo actually has a piece of dialogue that references Klonoa being gone forever, so that's canon in Namco High.
Finally, I believe they refered to this as a "dating game", when it's clearly a VN, and an iffy one at that. If you're that hard up for a free VN, well, Katawa Shoujo is still a thing.
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Pijaibros
Joined: 04 Dec 2006
Location: Casino Night Zone
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| Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 7:10 pm |
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| notbov wrote: |
Select Button
3 minutes in and I'm already irate about something |
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notbov
Joined: 14 Feb 2009
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| Posted: Sat Dec 21, 2013 5:26 am |
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I am a glutton for punishment
a route literally takes 10-15 minutes to go through, so I would venture so far as to describe paying money for anything associated with this to be a waste
I forgive it for all its flaws because they mentioned Marvel Land, the Namco game that doesn't get any respect
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