[Krazii Bakon Lypes]

Well the problem is that most shorts look downright stupid. Most men's shorts are far too big and baggy, and you end up looking like a fool. It's hard to find a pair that shows off my sturdy thighs, unless they're really short and very tight, and that's another problem right there. I have these Paul Frank shorts that look pretty good. I wish there was a fabric that was similar to madras but that wasn't so fucking loud looking. Linen or seersucker, maybe?

[Krazii Bakon Lypes]

I do, and I would rather have a centipede wrapped around my soaking wet erection in my tight jeans during summertime than be caught wearing fucking Lee Pipes or whatever fuckshits wear these days. Really, cargo shorts? Am I supposed to make people believe that my thighs are 50 inches around?

[Krazii Bakon Lypes]

Sorry Zeb I just don't really like shorts all of the sudden.

[Krazii Bakon Lypes]

Well then what are you talkin because unless you're talkin Scotch & Soda or ZBrand or Levi Redlines (or whatever they're called) I don't want to listen.

[Krazii Bakon Lypes]

Well alright then. Please continue.