[internisus]

Ging's description of some loser-y guy made me curious -- and that's not to say I would hold to the kind of judgment he clearly has. To what extent have any of you spent extended adult periods unemployed and living with your family or similar? What did you do with your time? What do you think about that period now, in hindsight?

[Laurel Soup]

[falsedan]

The period between finishing my degree and getting a full-time job was the first time I'd been seriously unemployed. Three months on the dole! Wasn't living with my parents (moved out when I was 17) but staying in family-owned accommodation.

Basically I watched a lot of TV and practiced having a job: got out of the house every morning and spent 8 hours doing stuff (mostly surfing the web at the library). It's difficult to apply for a 9-to-5 f you can't get out of bed before noon!

It was incredibly relaxing and unstressful, but didn't have any potential for growth/change. It showed me how hard it is to be unemployed, mentally and economically.

I strongly want to be unemployed again, so I am going on holiday for 2 months!
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[Mr Mustache]

Right after college I spent the summer at my parent's in Michigan. They were out of the country, and my friends were out of town for large chunks of time, so I mostly got high all day on the pot I had grown during my last semester, drank, played videogames,watched anime, and entertained myself in other mostly worthless ways. It was relaxing, but often pretty depressing, though not as depressing as the five or so months I spent unemployed in New York, doing the same things.

It's possible that the difference has more to do with location than vocation.
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The people are like wool to me

[Hot Stott Bot]

Can't say I've ever had this problem.

[Toto]

HSB crazy workaholic itt.
I'm not old enough to have experienced anything like this. Straight out of high school into Uni, and now I'm at Uni breaking my balls.
I have 30 hours next semester :D.

[aderack]

I had a job once, for two weeks. I didn't like it much.

I've actually been trying for three years, on and off, to get a job, just to give me some structure. Seems the only things people will pay me for, however, involve lounging around my bedroom. So, uh. Hm.

At least I've got a half-decent apartment.

See, my big problem is that I very easily lose track of time. Part of that is that I don't have much blocking it out, screaming at me that time is passing. The other part is that I'm not very good at multitasking; I tend to focus on one thing to the exclusion of all else, until it's finished. Then I move on. Since I'm not good at multitasking, however, I don't always (or often) notice enough parallel options as to efficiently prioritize. So I get stuck in this track, following something unimportant for hours and hours, not realizing the time is passing. Then I look up and realize that I haven't done anything I need to do, and there's no time left in the day. It's frustrating.

So. Yes. Structure would be nice.

[v84j3gs2uc7ns4]

[Felix]

my experience: housekeeping and literature go an extraordinarily long way. not long enough, mind - if you haven't gotten yourself to a position wherein you can have sex without having to precede it with a proper "date" each and every time, prior to becoming unemployed, you'll make yourself poor in the name of hedonism really quick (hi skye); take that to heart, at least, and you might well be happy with yourself despite not really "accomplishing" anything.

[aderack]

Huzzah for domestic partners, in other words.

[Toptube]

one of my friends recently decided to become a vagrant.

he lived with his parents and worked at Gamestop. He got tired of his life and became really whiny about how things weren't going anywhere for him (though I'm not sure he really tried to do anything about it).

so he decided roaming the western United states was how he was gonna find his answers. so far he's been doing it for one month, and only "came out of it" to go to an Arcade Fire concert in Portland that he'd already had tickets for.

[The Troops]

I've been doing nothing since November 18th, 2005.

You really don't realize how long it's been until you type it out like that.

You don't think about it that much, to be honest. It becomes routine. You get up. You check your email / forums / RSS feeds. You eat some cereal with 2% milk at your desk. You don't move the bowl after you do. It might sit there a day. If it seems like a good day out, you take a shower, on the off-chance you might actually open up the front door. Who knows, maybe you'll have to sign for something or pay for a pizza.

So you turn the bolt on the bathroom door and strip down to your underwear. You bend down and touch your toes a few times, because it seems like you're working towards something, and it's easy because you're lanky and flexible, and it's actually something you can feel good about. You look at yourself in the mirror and think about how many years it's been since a girl has seen this. It's not being wasted, you think. I'm just waiting. Waiting.

The water beats your scalp in thirty-two places, and you work your nails and conditioner into it. You haven't had a haircut in six months, and you can't really tell if you like it this way or not. Just give it another week, you think. You manage with exhaustive force to draw yet another tiny gob from the Clean & Clear Deep Action Cream Cleanser tube. You really, really hope it's not empty for good this time, because you're terrified of what the cashier might say if she were to ring it up.

The door opens with a rumbly roll. Out comes steam and two boney ankles. You feel really tired. You feel like you've accomplished enough for the day. Being clean is the most important thing, right? You sit in the window cill clipping your toenails in your towel, and you listen to the rustle of life out the window, and watch all the cars go across the bridge. They'll keep coming for as long as you care to look. Where are all those people going? What's it like to have a life?

Last summer I . . . I went through my first drive-thru. What an ordeal. Why oh why is Coolata such a gay word. I feel more at ease when I genericize trademarks, but who knows if "Iced Coffee" is something different? And why do I have to specify French Vanilla or Vanilla Bean? Being that specific was almost too much to bear, so I just said I didn't know, that I was picking it up for a friend, and took a gamble. I dropped change. I squealed off and cursed and banged the wheel all the way home. And I sipped my iced coffee.

I'm terrified of opening up my preferences/tastes to others. I feel so inferior when I talk about music. When I go into a store in the mall (extremely rare), I'm paralyzed. I'm afraid to look at anything, because I'm afraid someone might see me looking at it, and think I like it, so I tend to just rush in with a target in mind, looking at the floor the whole time. I try not to time my footsteps to be the beat of the music on the overhead speakers, because I'm afraid they'll think I like that too. It's much harder than it sounds.

I hovered over the submit button to the Graniph thread for ten minutes, afraid I would draw some kind of criticism I couldn't foresee. Everyone seems to hate everything I like or do. Except here. People are pretty nice to me here. But I'm still very, very careful. I only actually post one out of four posts I write. I have a very limited understanding of what's okay to say and do, and what makes people mad or laugh at me. The real world's always moving, in real time. I feel like I can't rehearse or plan or consider consequences. I always think I'll say something stupid. It's really scary, and my heart's always pounding when I'm talking to someone in real life.

I probably couldn't survive a job interview. I'd have to lie, which I'm not very good at either. They'll ask why I'm 22 and have no prior job experience. I guess I could say I was at school. A year ago I filled out two applications and handed them in. I never got any calls. I thought life was trying to tell me something, so I just stopped trying. I'd like to work behind a counter. I'd feel empowered. Like I'd conquered my fears. I'd be the one judging people this time. I can smile and speak happily. I just think I'd feel really guilty directing people to the products with the highest profit margins and pestering for trade-ins or Halo 3 pre-orders. I'm too docile for all that.

The best part about having no life is keeping an irregular schedule. You don't have to get up for anything, so you drift from week to week. You get to see a lot of sunrises. You can take the dog for a walk at seven in the morning, when you've been up for six hours, and you might cross a girl in a hoodie on her way to school, and she might say, "Cuuuuute!" and you can spend the rest of the day wondering whether she was talking to you or the dog.

On November 17th, 2005, I was in a Sociology class. There were a lot of criminal justice majors. We need a lot of those in this city. No one ever talked to each other in that class, despite the name. Everyone just arrived and scribbled and left, because they had to. This is why I stopped going to school, because from the beginning I had absolutely no reason to be there, and never expected to finish (very low expectations of myself). I was only there because it was the only place where I could be with other people my age, without seeming like I wanted to be there. Now I really don't know if that place even exists. The Dead Parents Life Insurance Fund is down to $50,000. Maybe less. I'll have to find a way to make money somehow. But right now, to me, it feels a lot like that novel you've been waiting to write. Something off in Somedayland.

[Touran]

I really enjoyed that post The Troops.

I'm getting myself into this sort of situation, as I may not enroll for another year in college and currently I have no job. I'm going to try to avoid it though, since the prospect to me is very depressing.
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Man, I'm sorry.

[rf]

This thread is depressing. I mean, I know how obvious that sounds, but it is.

I could almost see myself becoming a hikikomori type about a year ago, but then I got to college. At which point I discovered that I like people! It seemed so obvious in retrospect: that was why, instead of coming back to some solitary hobby, my time-wasting guilty pleasure was always the internet, which is, you know, basically an elaborate way to contact people.

So, to whichever shut-ins this message applies to (not all of them, it must be noted): you are probably just as interesting as most people with "lives," and you'd probably enjoy a "life" if you had one. It's kind of like the internet, but it happens a lot faster, and has a lot more flesh in it, and sometimes is conducted while eating food or drinking alcohol, both of which are fun. Of course, lots of people utterly suck, but try hard enough and you can avoid them, just as you check your favored RSS feeds and avoid XTREEM WACKY GAMERLOLZ COMIK X.

Sorry if this is patronizing. It's roughly what I'd say to my younger self, though I'm not sure if it matters in my case because it'd only lead to high school socializing if anything, and that tends to be closer to the XTREEM WACKY stuff in our analogy. (Which is how I got these I-don't-like-people attitudes in the first place, come to think of it.)
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[Toups]

Hi, welcome to my life for the past 6 months :(

If I wasn't in a band I'd probably go insane. That and the occasional party (once every other month or so) are really the only meaningful social interaction I get.

I just applied for something a job today, so... we'll see.
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[psiga]

This mostly just makes me think of a movie title like: IT CAME FROM HIKKIKOMOR
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[haircute]

Good read, The Troops.

When I first moved in with my sister I didn't have a job for...almost a year. I showed up on her porch one night covered in wine. I had a wicked shiner for some reason I still can't remember. I had to walk to her house because I forgot where I left my car. Pretty lame! When she came outside in the afternoon to smoke a cigarette she said "HEY! What're you doing here? And why do you smell...like...oh god..."

I sat up, vomited, and said "Hi, I'm going to live with you now."

I spent the next four months on her couch playing Dragon Quest 7, watching daytime tv, and drinking cheap scotch.

Then I got a job, made money, and here I am!

In hindsight...I have to say that that was the most fun I've had in my life.
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Get Wild and Tough!

[Maztorre]

[Felix]

[Maztorre]

[extrabastardformula]

Shortly after Katrina I was staying in a motel a couple of blacks from the Astrodome. I found it hard to connect with the other people ther on account of being white and not having any faith in the magical power of imaginary dead Jews to aid me in my current situation or in the hereafter. I turned on the TV and saw Bono telling me that there were people like myself and it was my duty to send money to help them. Mostly I just went out and looked for work every day from five in the morning till six at night. I ate donuts because they were cheap.

Not much else happened with regards to mental health deteriorating though. But I still take a shower instead of a bath and don't forsee myself filling the tub for a long time.
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[extrabastardformula]

Shortly after Katrina I was staying in a motel a couple of blacks from the Astrodome. I found it hard to connect with the other people ther on account of being white and not having any faith in the magical power of imaginary dead Jews to aid me in my current situation or in the hereafter. I turned on the TV and saw Bono telling me that there were people like myself and it was my duty to send money to help them. Mostly I just went out and looked for work every day from five in the morning till six at night. I ate donuts because they were cheap.

Not much else happened with regards to mental health deteriorating though. But I still take a shower instead of a bath and don't forsee myself filling the tub for a long time.
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[extrabastardformula]

Shortly after Katrina I was staying in a motel a couple of blacks from the Astrodome. I found it hard to connect with the other people ther on account of being white and not having any faith in the magical power of imaginary dead Jews to aid me in my current situation or in the hereafter. I turned on the TV and saw Bono telling me that there were people like myself and it was my duty to send money to help them. Mostly I just went out and looked for work every day from five in the morning till six at night. I ate donuts because they were cheap.

Not much else happened with regards to mental health deteriorating though. But I still take a shower instead of a bath and don't forsee myself filling the tub for a long time.
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[aderack]

[dongle]

I am currently trying to not be a leech anymore. Graduation for me is on the 10th and I have a museum internship lined up at home until September when I'm taking the GREs, but then I'm going to Boston with um no job in sight. What shall I do? Which subject will I study in graduate school after taking my year off to do an entry-level job? What will I do with that degree?

Knowing my tendencies, I'm probably going to do the bare minimum, end up leeching off my gf a bit, and fail to do anything near my potential.

If anyone has any tips on focusing one's interests and energy to a singular area and excelling at it, let me know.

[CubaLibre]

Troops: if you think working behind a counter is going to be any better than school, it isn't. Once again you are the lowest rung on a long, long ladder, forced to scribble notes in an incomprehensible and useless format by an administrator that literally has no way to relate to you. In fact, schooling is nothing more than training for satisfaction in such cog-jobs. The difference (and it is a nice difference) is that they pay you, rather than the other way around.

Also, hate to break it to you, dude: it was the dog.

dongle: It's about passion! If I didn't work in a field rife with things that piss me off I'd never do anything.
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Let's Play, starring me.

[Hot Stott Bot]

dongle: For me it is all about putting myself in a situation where there is lots of outside pressure to make me do what I want. Like I could never do a videogame on my own, I need the pressure of a schedule and a workplace to do that.

[dongle]

[parkbench]

[SplashBeats]

i'm only at peace when i'm in motion

make of that what you will

(die hikkiomori)

[CubaLibre]

[dongle]

Fuck the ivy league; I should have gone to SJCA. You're right: I don't want a hard filter, but I also lack a relative concentration. Sigh. Well, aside from compsci, but I majored in the Classics in an attempt to get a well-rounded education. Back to school!

[Ratoslov]

This explains everything about Select Button.


Currently, I'm going through a period kind of like this. It comes and goes in swells; I'm almost graduated from college, but during the summer I tend to become a shut-in and get depressed. I've even got a 'job' right now, but it's a non-paying internship with no fixed hours and no structure. So I tend to go to a nocturnal sleep cycle, so I don't have to deal with the summer heat and bright light and people. I've actually gotten a lot better, but it took years of therapy.

Even so, even during my good productive times, I don't really have a life, just jobs that don't pay. I've been too broke to go to out and have fun for I don't know how long. I have some wierd psychological block about seeking employment. I've never had a successful date in my life. I don't really ever have friends, just people I know.

Man, this was depressing to write.

[CubaLibre]

[Mr Mustache]

When did you graduate?
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The people are like wool to me

[zak]

I live with my parents, but we have a big house next to a lake, with a yard and such, and one in town where I usually spend a few days alone during the week, so it's not bad. I'm not shut-in or depressed at all; I see my friends for drinks at least once a week. I go to parties, but not too often because I'm not a very outgoing person (I like meeting new, interesting people though).

Never had a job in my life (I'm 19 now). Actually, I worked for a gaming magazine last year, but it went under in about six months, and I got really shitty pay for lots of work. Last December an internet gaming oriented tv station offered me a a job. It involved translating news, riding the subway, and two busses, for two hours, five days a week, and the money was a joke, so I passed.

Right now I'm doing book reviews for a major site (not getting paid), some freelance work (also not getting paid), and writing for literary contests (sure as hell not getting paid). Won one of those early this year, and it netted me about 50 dollars and some books, so I mainly did it for fun. Entered another one this month, we'll see how it goes.

Also, because I want to be a writer, I dropped out of college. I studied literature and english, for a year, and noticed it did absolutely nothing for me. I'm going back this fall, only this time I'm gonna study philosophy, and I really think it's gonna work out this time.

So this summer I'm just sitting arround the house, playing guitar in a band, working on a short story collection, and maybe swinging by the beautiful sea for a week with my friends. My parents give me a hard time sometimes, beacause (to the untrained eye) I don't seem to be doing anything at all, but this is usually remedied by doing some yard work (fucking hate mowing the lawn, washing the car is ok). My only real chance of getting a job in the future would involve working at newspapers or doing translation work anyway.

[CubaLibre]

[Mr Mustache]

Did you know a Mr. Sloat?
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The people are like wool to me

[Predator Goose]

I can't respond to this thread. I can't even read this thread. Because I just keep hearing Morgan Freeman saying "Moorish".
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I can no longer shop happily.

[parkbench]

I was pretty close to going to St. John's. I chickened out, I suppose. Going to Hampshire now.
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metafilter vs. youtube comments

[shrugtheironteacup]

I almost went to Saint John's as well. Then they told me I could afford to pay them over $20,000 a year for the privilege. Eventually I stopped attending to the high school that bored me and my grades plummeted and I got a lot of talks about not living up to my potential.

My refusal to go into debt has led in large part to my listless blue collar existence.
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